Chaos. That is the first thing that came to my mind when I thought about the world around me since COVID-19 interrupted our lives. Yes, I had my days of being productive and “getting shit done”, but I also had plenty of days where I just couldn’t do anything. I just did not have the energy some days. The days I lacked energy, I was disappointed in myself because I know I am such a goal-getter, and there was plenty to be done. But then, the gentle side of me would remind me that I am working and parenting through a global pandemic, where sometimes I still don’t have time to have self-care time because I am making sure everything around me is done. Thus sometimes, I am just freaking tired. That is okay. But you know what they say, an idle mind is the devils playground, and I could also tell that was beginning to happen.
There would be days were I would look in the mirror and not like what I see. Not enough energy to dress up to sit in the house, but not thrilled by the untamed hair and pj/ sweats all day either. At the time, it was also still Winter like weather so I was also dealing with the woes of that. I needed sun and fresh air but good ol’ Ohio was getting chilling heavy winds, rain, and even snow on some days between April and May. My mood was way down and I couldn’t find anything to keep me picked up consistently enough.
That was until one day my sorority sister reached out to me and asked if I wanted to be a part of a 21-Day Abundance group. I’ll be honest, although I said yes, I was unsure of how it would go. I had thought about meditation before and talked to some people who did do it, but I didn’t feel like I could get into it. It seemed like, “white people ish” and not really for me. I thought I would feel silly, and I did, at least the first couple of days. It was a personal journey of me being by myself and completing the daily challenges alone in my room before I started the day, but I still felt silly. On the first couple of days, I would find myself half doing it or at some point opening my eyes and saying, “okay that’s enough of that.” However, I didn’t give up with the completing the challenges and I still did the meditations. By perhaps the 4th or 5th day, I felt more in tune. I felt more focused. I started to feel at peace and back to myself since all of this chaos had taken place. I felt more aware and whole which was the purpose of the challenge.
Here is what I gained during the 21-Days Abundance Challenge:
- Clarity, during a time when life began to seem uncertained, I began to be clear on myself and purpose. I also became more clear of those around me.
- Appreciation, because sometimes we get so caught up in appreciating others that we forget to appreciate ourselves. I also gained appreciation for the Most High and what He was doing in my life despite what it seemed. Lastly, I gained appreciation for the process. I went from thinking it would be something silly to taking it very serious and not wanting to go without making it a part of my day as soon as I could.
- Awareness, of myself. My thoughts, feelings, and emotions both known and unknown. The journal entries, assignments, daily phrases, and mantra produced a level of awareness that I cannot even explain.
- Peace, when you focus on the present and the future and what the universe has for you it is way more peaceful.
- Confidence, because it is important to love yourself in the now. You are worthy, I am worthy, no matter what happened in the past or what someone has said. You speak life into yourself. You are who you want to be and nothing can stop you from that besides you!
I could honestly go on and on, but I do not want to make this post longer than it has to be. However, I will say, meditation is for you regardless of who you are. All you have to do is give it a try and not give up right away just because it feels funny the first few times. I would also say that this challenge pushed my levels of comfort and because I was willing, I excelled and I feel as though you can too. I now follow daily mantras on Twitter (https://twitter.com/iammantra) and I do meditations throughout my week.
Please share your experience with meditation, abundance challenges, or anything else related. I look forward to hearing from you and answering questions!
Adventures with Ny 